resistivity | inbox;

( that. honestly sounds like. mako's worst nightmares. you know what? he thought it was korra dying, but it's actually korra and asami talking about his dick. please no. please never.

he just sort of instantly looks as if the most interesting thing in the world is now something way over there in the distance and look he's even squinting at it to prove it. he's a detective!! he detects things!! things that are over there, far away, and have absolutely nothing to do with korra and asami talking about him. )

Uh. Oh? You have? I. Uh. That's. Nice.

( facepalm. Why,

it is pretty cute though. korra shakes her head, cracking a smile at him. please don't be awkward. you're going to make korra awkward. )

We both love you, Mako. Like — that, you know.

( she rubs the back of her neck. )

Look, we just. We talked about it! ( it!!!!!! ) The three of us. I don't want to confuse you more, okay. Whenever ... we see Asami again, she'll do a better job than me at explaining this.

( he actually. puts his hands over his ears. it's not really to block out the sound so much as drag his fingers up into his hair so it sticks out all over in a ridiculous, ruffled mess. )

Korra! I really don't think this is something we need to be — getting into right now!

( he sounds so strangled. pls no. send help. he would give anything for bolin to just run past them and canonball into the pool as a distraction. why can't he summon his brother with sheer force of will. )

( nevermind, be as awkward as you want, korra is currently living for it. she shares a bright smile with him, and it's entirely as his expense, but. korra doesn't feel overwhelmingly guilty. she stretches her arms out, crosses her hands behind her head, and flops back down on the lush green grass behind them, smiling up at the sun peeking barely through the stained glass windows of the trees. )

All I'm saying is, when she finds out we kissed, she'll probably just be mad she wasn't here to watch.

( a hand reaches out and thwaps him softly on the side. )

Ease up, soldier!

( he flops down beside her, groaning loudly as he covers his face with his hands. this is classic, peak not now, boner behavior. if mako was even a little less disciplined than he is he'd be doing the ol' waistband tuck right about now. )

I am going to throw you in that pond if you keep this up. I mean it.

I'd love to see you try.

( korra is. very much enjoying this. not even just the teasing, but the way they fall back into each other, as if the past 48 hours haven't been entwined with anxiety, and korra thinking mako hates her, and. a whole lot of re-remembering old wounds that never really healed. korra's on her back but facing him, smiling at him, watching the sun dapple his skin in light.

she takes a little mercy. )

Just think about it. No pressure, okay? I know it's ... super weird, but. ( her expression softens, smile a little sweeter. ) We've all been through a lot. I think we've all earned some good. ( and then she gets wolfish again, eyes alight. ) Oh, and it'd be good —

( he doesn't really want to think about it. his relationship with asami was a first in a lot of ways, but. he can't really forget (or more importantly, forgive himself for) how often and badly he hurt her. )

It's not weird.

( he does want to reassure her of that. he doesn't really know if she's referring to herself and asami, or... the three of them together, but he's still not going to let her get away with calling anything she wants an aberration.

he ends up with his arm draped over his eyes, but he reaches out for her with his other hand, finding the path of her elbow down to her wrist. twining their fingers together like he needs it just to breathe. )

I just. I don't know if I can really. Face her. After everything.

( she eases up at that. it’s a little softer than the fluster of his embarrassment, and her fingers ease against his, squeezing him reassuringly. she’s facing him, expression an understanding kind of calm. she’s only ever hurt asami, too. but - at a certain point, you have to accept the forgiveness that’s given to you, no matter how difficult it is to swallow. )

If she wants you to, don’t you owe it to her?

( it’s how korra accepted the love that was offered up. asami wanted her, despite the faults in their past. korra rolls her shoulders, kissed by the grass. )

Maybe you should date around, see what you want. It might be fun! We get to be, like, normal for once while we’re here.

I don't know. I'd. Have to talk to her about it. I mean, what if she shows up and she's from ten years in the future? Or four years ago, before Amon? It's a mess. I can't think about this right now.

( there's a frustrated noise, and he just rips a bit of grass out by the roots, shakes it off his hands.

spirits. what even is normal? mako has no idea anymore. 'normal' for him is still... living in a garbage heap, scrounging out of bins, stealing clothing off washing lines because he grew like a weed and going barefoot for want of shoes. being hungry all the time. it doesn't matter how long he's been off the streets, that's still what his mind defaults to.

and then what, dating asami and korra at the same time isn't enough for him to think about, but. other people, too? he's not sure if he can even care about anyone else when all his love is tied up in the girls and bolin. it's a finite resource for him, he isn't... wired like bolin and korra and even asami, who can be so gracious and good and open. who can love endlessly, accepting the consequences in doing so. )

Korra, 'normal' for me just means working a hundred hours a week busting crooks in Republic City.

( they're being honest with each other, right? well, that's his admission. mako has never known or... understood how to live for himself. it seems ridiculous to consider who he is when he's not making himself indispensable to someone because he's. afraid the answer is nothing. )

Edited 2018-09-26 19:57 (UTC)

( she hasn't thought about all those what ifs, even if they're plausible outcomes. honestly, the thought hadn't even crossed her mind until mako put it to words, but - no, she's not going to consider it. she'll go crazy with possibilities if she does. the universe wants the two ( and three ) of them to be together. if she ever showed up here, it'd be with a full understanding of her feelings towards korra.

he is right, though. it's between him and asami. korra lets the subject drop, although she'll likely be thinking about it hours after this.

that second part gives her pause. her fingers trace the calloused bumps of mako's knuckles softly, although her expression is sort of torn at the seams, eyebrows knitted. with a little bewilderment, she opens her mouth and shuts it aptly. opens it again. )

You've always been more than just a cop.

( this is mako. he's the guy who always has her back, no question about. the one who makes sure they all eat during stakeouts, the first to offer up his coat if anyone's shivering, the last to tuck in at night until everyone else is safely in bed. mako has a pretty face, but the most handsome thing about him has always been his heart, that parental type of protection he insists over them and the entirety of republic city, like a watchful guardian. korra knows he takes his job seriously, but ... she's been gone for a few years. she wasn't there to see it turn from an occupation into a lifestyle. )

I know being here won't always be easy, but ... when was the last time you had fun, Mako? Before we got here.

( why is everyone so obsessed with him having fun? it's not like it's a fundamental need. there's nothing necessary about it. mako heaves a sigh, and tucks his free hand beneath his head to prop it up. he's still looking up at the sky like he'll find the answers to the universe tucked into the luminous scrollwork of clouds dotting the skyline. )

I guess... that pro-bending match we all did for charity, after Harmonic Convergence? Where we finally beat Tahno's smug face?

( he's aware of how pathetic that sounds. it was three years ago. don't @ him. )

I've just been so busy, Korra. There hasn't been time, and —

( bolin was gone. korra was gone. asami was travelling the world promoting future industries. mako would just. make shitty instant noodles in his shitty apartment and sleep on his shitty mattress and go to work and do it all over again. there was no room in his life for anything but that.

but that would just make her feel guilty all over again, so he trails off with a frustrated sigh. )

I'm the stuffy, boring one, remember? 'I had fun once, it nearly killed me'?

( he is definitely... imitating bolin's imitation of him. whoops. )

Edited 2018-09-28 03:41 (UTC)

( she doesn't think it's pathetic. if anything it's ... indisputably, the kind of thing to be expected of mako when no one is there to keep him in check. he's always tossed himself headfirst into whatever he's doing - pro-bending, policework, the various avatar stunts korra has dragged him into. he'd drown himself in paperwork sooner than he'd take a personal day. korra lets out a loud, drawn out sigh, shaking her head.

they all failed each other, in all manner of different ways. korra's acknowledging what a shitty friend she's been to him for the past long while. at least - instead of getting sad about it, she's opting to make up for lost time. )

You're a thousand things, but boring has never been one of them.

( she'll fight anyone who says otherwise. twisting on her side, she faces him, free hand protecting her cheek from the tickle of grass. )

Okay, how about, when was the last time you had a vacation?

( please don't say never. please do not say never. )

I mean...

( it's never. it is definitely never. at least he doesn't just say that. instead, he wrinkles his nose, obviously trying to sift through his memories for anything... vaguely vacation-like. )

That Festival at the South Pole? And I had a few weeks off for my arm, before Varrick's wedding.

Out of commission is not a vacation.

( she has good memories of the south pole, though. when ... she wasn't being a little bratty in his direction, honestly. she still has a fondness for that sky bison stuffed animal.

heaving up, korra scoots in closer to him, effectively blocking out the sun he's looking at with her big, dumb face. she raises her eyebrows, encouragingly. )

Pretend this is a vacation, while we're here. You're allowed to ... you know. Not clock into work everyday. Maybe sleep in sometimes. Eat fire chips in bed. Go on dates with people. ( korra squeezes his hand, reassuringly. ) You're going to go crazy if you just cook and clean all the time.

( his mouth twists off to one side in self-directed frustration. )

Korra... it's not that easy.

( she makes it sound like it is. but. every fiber of his being absolutely rebels at the idea. if he stops moving, that's when the past catches up with him, crashes into him, that's when he has to actually sit down and think about all the things he's done, all the mistakes he's made. )

You know it's not.

( she knows him so well. maybe better than anyone. they've seen all the ugliness in each other and somehow they still see each other shining. )

( from idly amused to tentatively worried, her expression drops. it doesn't sound all that difficult to her, but. she and mako are different people. she might be tuned into his radiowaves, but he operates on a different channel, apart from hers. she can only watch him as he tears himself slowly apart, leaving pieces for everyone, and nothing for himself.

no, korra doesn't accept that. she'll die before she gives up on trying to keep mako drawn into the light. )

I know.

( she thumps him on the side. )

Try? Me and Bolin love you more than you'll ever know, but it's not a bad idea to make some friends outside of the circle while you're here. Friend friends, not just you being a detective at everyone.

( except he does know. he carries love like a burden — he's never doubted once in his heart or mind or soul that korra and bolin would both die for him, given the chance. and it's. it's terrifying, to stare that possibility in the eye. like facing down koh in the spirit world, barely breathing. fear in every line of your body. he can't survive loss. he had to, once.

he reaches for her and says nothing, just sits up and pulls her into a hug. it feels good to use both arms to embrace her. )

Okay. I'll try.

( he says that mashed up against her shoulder, his breath warm on her skin. )

I like the jinba girl. Konoha, have you met her?

( she hugs him, holds him. a hand slides up to his hair to cup the back of his head, sorting out the place that got fussed in his embarrassment earlier. korra's more aligned with him now, sitting hip to hip. he's a warm, comforting fog - korra's more like a cool breeze, nosed against him. )

Does she, ( a very vague wave behind her, that translates somewhere into half horse? ) you know?

I met her. She was really excited about the color of my skin.

( a laugh. )

Yeah, that's her. She's a real sweetheart. She kind of reminds me of you, when you first came to Republic City.

( he leans into that hair ruffling, because #menareweak. )

Maybe a little less on the fiery side. But she's kind and compassionate and wants to help everybody. That stuff.

( cute ... korra will keep it up. she's more gentle than she is with naga. men are weak. )

What a compliment. She's pretty cute.

( personality wise, but. you know. now that she's told mako she likes girls, there's a different light on compliments. she means it that way, too.

she also saw her baps on the first meeting, so. cute is a little bit of an understatement. )

I bet Bolin would like her too, if they haven't met. We should have her over sometime.

( honestly mako is an extremely tactile person, for all that he's not exactly touchy, so having a hand in his hair basically just makes him weak at the knees.

korra could probably get him to do literally anything for the price of a few light strokes. not that that's any different from how they normally operate, though.

also: bolin and konoha would be too much pure-heartedness in one room, which of course means they have to do it. it makes something catch and stutter in his heart to think of his brother getting to meet someone who's as good and bright as he is. )

That's an amazing idea, why didn't I think of that? Yeah! We should. She's from a place sort of like ours, but... older, I think? She mentioned samurai.

Edited 2018-09-29 04:25 (UTC)

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